Monkey See Monkey Do...

Guys, I really want to vent out something right now, because it's really starting to feed inside of me. Like, granted all of the things that have been happening right now, it's really starting to tense up and get on my nerves, and I feel that I have to get a couple of things straight about me.

So, of course, the AkaiDalia drama thing is full fledged again because of Akai's hypocritical "I don't support rape" banner thing and her saying one of her gifts didn't look interesting. Why am I not showing you guys evidence of these things? Because of the following:

1) Everyone most likely already knows and don't need to be reminded a million times about it.
2) Honestly, I feel it isn't worth my time at the moment.

Guys, I do rants because it helps me relax when I get really angry or frustrated about something. Sometimes I do hate art, but only offline. And I NEVER submit it. But I never do rants to gain any kind of watchers or popularity, just for fun, or to keep an old flame alive. I want to talk about subjects that happened now and still can be resolved, and I feel that the game of making rants and not really fixing anything is REALLY starting to get old. The main reason why I started doing rants in the first place was to propose a SOLUTION, not continue the problem.

I feel that there is something I need to explain. I think, believe it or not, we're BOTH at fault in this entire drama. Now, I'm not saying this because I regret what I said in the videos, or think that Akai is right (because most likely, I'll stick to my word and never be Akai's fan again), but there is just this whole war stomping on because everybody is saying that one side is wrong and the other is right. And I feel the war has been going on for so long it's becoming more of a trend than an actual problem that we want to SOLVE. Because I have noticed, it's really easy to complain about something and not do anything about it. People here and there say "Akai does this, Akai does that" but don't propose solutions to actually see if we can do anything about it. If that's not the case, people just point it out because:

a) They have nothing else better to do and are bored
b) They feel like venting out their frustrations through another conflict
c) They see their friends doing it and feel like doing it, too

Now I can be wrong, and I know that I'm not gonna support ANY of what I'm saying with real evidence, because I honestly feel now that it ISN'T WORTH MY TIME. I came here on deviantART to make ART, not poke fun at others and/or complain 24/7 about problems that exist EVERYDAY. I just came here to have fun, and lately, I feel that being on deviantART has become more of a chore than fun. I appreciate the comments, and the gifts, and my friends, and I know that we all need to complain about something just to make things more interesting, but when you stay at ONE topic ALL THE TIME, it REALLY starts to get on your nerves, and you feel the CONSTANT pressure to have to please people. This has nothing to do with Point Commissions or Art Trades or any of that, of course, because it's a really nice way to challenge myself, but I'm talking about people constantly commenting to me ONLY to talk about issues that I thought were resolved or really have no relevance anymore because the person is ignorant and will always be ignorant. And I don't want people simply watching me ONLY because of my rants, because it makes it feel like my art is worth shit. And I know I sound angry about it, but when people just come to me for only the videos and not appreciate what the website was created for in the first place, it makes it seem like I'm selling myself out.

Even a friend of mine (who I won't mention), who I feel is the ringleader of this entire drama, I fear that even SHE won't be open to what I have to say. I feel that telling her this, she would kick me out or something... Like one time, I told her I was starting to have doubts after the Yoshi Drama thing about Akai, and then she told me to "back out now and leave" if I was suddenly feeling "scared". What, so now thinking about a situation is called being scared? SHOULD I be scared when I start to question certain things? It gives me the impression that my mind should be numbed down and follow the bandwagon wherever it goes, not matter how fast or bumpy it is.

I'm not writing this because I like Akai. No, I don't like her. But I don't think she's the WORST person in the world, y'know?

And I feel that people are starting to get pressured into accepting our ideas just to be against Akai. An example I can point out I guess is the picture Brendolina recreated of Akai's image of Sonic Boom based off of Akai's Boom Love pic, only with Shadow and Scourge. People were of course saying it's awesome and stuff, but then one deviant (I can't remember her name All I can say is that we hit things off roughly at first but ended the problem well) actually questioned something: isn't what the artist is doing TRACING artwork? Wouldn't that be STEALING, even if she credited the artist and the artist is alright with that? Our anger towards Akai has gotten so out of hand that even our MORALS are starting to get twisted. And I thank that person for pointing it out, because it was TRUE. People tried to defend it because it has a lot more effort than Akai's original, but it doesn't change the fact that the art is still TRACED, and that TRACED ARTWORKS are not really okay in this community. We try to excuse that just because it's against Akai, and that's what really gets me upset.

I am not joining Akai's side and never will after everything we went through. And I am not stopping with any rants or projects with DCCL and Levi-Matters because we have lots of fun together, and it's fun to do parodies and plan things together. But I don't want to be part of a cause that's lost. I don't like seeing people just complaining and not do anything about it. Even if Akai is STILL wrong, WE HAVE DONE WRONG.

We judge Akai for her hate art, yet people do it too. But they are excused because "our biased opinion towards Akai is the right one" and it serve Akai right. She hasn't even DONE hate art anymore. Pity art? Sure. But NOT hate art.

And her character is a slut, yes, but that can't be a HUGE reason why we have to be against her. She can do whatever she wants with that character (though people will still disagree with it), and of course it's gonna be wrong, but then again, a LOT of other WORSE Mary-Sues exist here on DA, and they aren't receiving our crap for it. And that's not fair.

Akai is wrong when she says that we are cyber-bullying her, and doesn't understand what true cyber-bullying is. LEVI-MATTERS knows what that is because she went THROUGH IT. But it IS true when people come up to her ONLY to complain. There are people that left critiques for Akai and Akai just bullshitted there, and she doesn't appreciate gifts nor hardly interacts with her fans, but then again, if she doesn't want critiques, then let's leave her alone. I only did mines because I thought Akai would listen and compare my version of giving a critique to other more polite and nicer versions of it so she would appreciate it more. I didn't just do it out of fun. I did it to vent something out and express my opinions on her artwork, just like YOU guys can come and say that I have the worst shit ever, and that won't bother me a bit because I KNOW what I can do and definitely am mature enough to take that kind of critique. But you know, if we know a person doesn't like something, then we might as well stop doing it, because it's POINTLESS.

I admit that I DID THINGS WRONG. I know I let my emotions get out of hand at times, and that has lead to really bad consequences, and I make assumptions about things sometimes and end up hurting people. So, why is it that nobody can admit that THEY have made mistakes? Akai has made mistakes, but what about US? What are WE doing wrong that Akai isn't willing to listen?

I know I might as well get lots of comments telling me to stop thinking these things and continue with what we're doing, but I don't want to keep doing something so we don't find ANY RESOLUTION ABOUT IT. I am NOT gonna keep a problem alive only to find something to do and NOT fix it like REAL ADULTS. Lots of people are going to disagree with me on this, but this is how I feel. I FEEL that people are FORCING me to find something to complain about. I'm not saying that you're doing this on purpose, but it has become so common now that I can't even sit in piece and do artwork when a bunch of comments are telling me "LOOK! AKAI DID THIS! CHECK IT OUT! XD" Aren't you guys getting SICK of the same thing over and over and over again? Don't you guys want this to STOP? So we can all move on and do what we were meant to do on this site? DO ART? Isn't that why we're here in the first place?

We tried looking for a solution with the petition, but people are so negative and close-minded about these kinds of solutions because they say "Akai will never change", that in the end it NEVER works, because people aren't willing to put any effort to make a CHANGE and REALLY end the problem. And I know I am going to get LOTS of shit from saying this, but it has come to the point where PEOPLE SEEM TO WANT THE DRAMA AND NEVER WANT IT TO END.

People come because their friend got hurt, or because they had a personal experience with her. If not, then you're here to set morals straight and end a particular problem. But people now (not saying ALL, because there are people that have really good intentions) seem to only join this to gain attention. Or they just want to vent out their anger. So, aren't you guys getting REAL sick of the same cycle again and again? I am.

I'm just saying... If people REALLY want Akai to stop the crap, you might as well IGNORE her. Boycott her like IWishForAFish explained! It doesn't mean we're letting her win or anything. But let her popularity and pageviews drop, her art not improve, keep doing the same shit, and people will GET AWAY from her because they're tired of it. And you know what happens in the story of "The Boy who Cried Wolf"; the boy calls people when there are no wolves that when it REALLY comes, no one cares and believes him anymore. That applies to Akai and US, for calling out on too many things and not coming up with solutions to problems.

And I know that probably saying a bunch of this crap I may have come up with some contradictions, but fuck that! Because I just need to vent my frustration out. I just want to do art, not play 24/7 "Who's the Worst Whiner" game.

Please understand that I STILL will make rant videos and stuff, and tackle relevant issues on DA, but I just don't want to talk about Akai for the moment. Yeah, we can talk about her once in a while, but don't keep telling me that "OH AKAI DID THIS AKAI DID THAT" when we aren't going to do anything about it. I'm a girl to look for solutions, on dwell on the issues.

If you have any questions or doubts, you can come and ask ^ w ^ I know I sound angry here, but I still really love you guys. Really. I wouldn't have thought I would get even more than 50 watchers? XD I really appreciate your kind words and attention, and know that you guys just want to vent out some frustration with me. And that's completely normal. But I'm saying, if the vase is broken, crying about it won't do anything. Just stand up, pick up the pieces and put it together. It may not look the same as before, but at least it's something...